Tag Archives: advice

Martha is the Toast of the Justin Beiber Roast–Kills Comedy Monologue

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The reviews are in: Martha is receiving near unanimous praise for her comedy monologue (video) at Comedy Central’s Roast of Justin Bieber. If you are familiar with these roasts, you  know that there is little that is considered “crossing the line”–and Martha certainly delivered with no holds barred. As she has done in the past, Martha did not shy away from references to her time spent in a women’s penitentiary, and offered Bieber some advice for surviving prison. The other panelists, and the audience, absolutely LOVED it. It seems the public agrees, as Martha has been the toast of the internet and social media since the program aired!

Watch Martha’s segment here (video). PLEASE NOTE: The humor is NSFW.

These jokes were reportedly cut from the telecast:

“Justin, you have no idea what you’re in for. I’m sure it’s great to have 60 millions followers on Twitter. But the only place people will be following you in prison will be into the shower.”

She also offered Bieber some advice on his tattoos:

“You have an owl on your arm and the word ‘patience’ on your neck. I would suggest the words ‘White power’ so you don’t look like some 14-year-old girl’s Trapper Keeper.”

After this performance, it seems likely Martha will be asked back for more. It’s gonna be tough to top this one!

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Martha’s New Book, “Living the Good Long Life”, to be published January 2013

Martha provided some details on her blog about her next book, “Living the Good Long Life”. Martha definitely seems well-qualified to offer advice on the topic: At 71, she looks absolutely smashing and appears remarkably calm for a business leader focused on a pivotal year ahead, including the launch of the new partnership with J.C. Penney and her new line of fine furniture. What do you think, FOMs: Are you looking forward to Martha’s new book? What did you think of Martha’s “Homekeeping Handbook”?

(Confession: “Homekeeping Handbook” is probably the Martha book I love the most. It is an encyclopedia of EVERYTHING one needs to know about keeping a home, from setting a table to cleaning every household item imaginable. It’s an large, informative and impressive book. I’ve even shared with others as a housewarming gift.)

From the Martha Stewart blog:

“This new book, ‘Living the Good Long Life’, has an expected publication date of January 29, 2013. What my ‘Homekeeping Handbook’ did for every aspect of keeping house, ‘Living the Good Long Life’ does for living the most healthy life after 40. In this book, I impart my expertise in my signature topics – eating, exercise, intellect, home, and organizing. It’s really the definitive handbook on staying well physically and mentally into and beyond middle age. This book is important because over the next 20 years, the US population of baby boomers aged 65 and up will jump nearly 80 percent to 1 in every 5 Americans. There’s a tremendous need for clear and inspiring information, tools, and resources as more people and their families face the challenges and responsibility of getting older and caring for one who is aging.”

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